![]() A more lighthearted thing he notes is that any gay bar anywhere is at most 30 minutes away from playing CeCe Peniston’s “ Finally.” While Holmes is self-deprecating at times and plays at being a curmudgeon, overall there is a warmth and sincerity that carries throughout. Of course, not all of these observations are of the quiet heartbreak kind. He would just have made a mistake as people do, and he and his friends would live to touch another’s butts another day. He wouldn’t worry about what everyone else thought about him, or about how many rungs in his mistake had knocked him down the social ladder, or whether he actually did suck. And if it did, this boy would get upset for a second or two, and then just shake it off. It might result in the other team winning. It might even result in the other team scoring. The following passage is captivating and equal parts funny and sad:īut here’s the part that I truly couldn’t and still can’t quite believe: sometimes a boy would send the ball to the wrong person, or someone from the other team would knock him down, or he would break one of the five million rules about where your hands and feet are supposed to go, and his plan wouldn’t work out at all. One example of this is him describing playing sports on the playground, a fraught time and place for someone who has to perform a certain kind of masculinity. He has a very keen ability to slow moments down and examine them to expose a nugget of truth. While the memoir hits similar beats of its peers, the greatest strength of Holmes’ book is its specificity. Later, a friend points out that the major lesson of the experience is that perhaps he doesn’t need to fit in with people, but to be okay with himself first and foremost. The second occurs after a day-long retreat full of pop-psychology that Dave believes to be ultimately pointless at first. He first realizes that he has aged out of mainstream pop culture and makes peace with that. He also quits smoking, begins to exercise more, starts seeing a therapist and meets his boyfriend, Ben. ![]() ![]() and going for acting gigs, but the only roles open to him are the stock “sassy best friend” character. As he continues working there, he sees more and more how the proverbial sausage is made and gets frustrated with the network as it tries to maintain a progressive image but without making any real efforts.Īfter 9/11, Holmes finds himself in L.A. Although he was a runner-up, he’s persistent enough to get a job at the network. On a whim, he decides to enter into MTV’s first I Wanna Be A VJ contest. He plugs along at his advertising firm job, hangs out with his Friends-like group of friends and goes to various gay bars. It’s there he meets a guy he falls head-over-heels for, but this first relationship fizzles out quickly.Īfter college, and a brief but important encounter with the Indigo Girls, he moves to New York City. After he pens an anonymous letter in the school paper about being gay, his school decides to haphazardly create a support group for gay students. He flunks his freshman year, making up the classes elsewhere, but returns a year behind his friends. He spends most of high school crushing on a straight friend and desperately pretending to be “normal.” College is no better to him than high school. He begins to realize that he is “both different and different” and finds refuge in pop culture and his friends working at the school candy store. He’s the type who is less interested in tending the goal and more interested in entertaining the people in the stands. Readers are introduced to a young Dave, youngest of three in a Catholic family, living in St. All of it is set to the soundtrack of the hits from the past few decades. It is also the story of someone trying hard to be a somebody, who ultimately learns to be himself. (And this isn’t even the deepest cut: there’s an anecdote about Su Pollard.) It’s also a sign that this book, which easily could have been a quick cash-in on his notoriety or a missive about the ills of Hollywood, is more invested in telling a singular story along with keeping the reader entertained.Īnd what is Dave Holmes’ story? Party of One is the story of someone who grew up using pop culture as a haven from a harsh world, who then becomes disillusioned with it after working in the industry that produces it, but eventually learns how to engage with it on his own terms. This is a sign to potential readers that there are a bevy of pop culture references ahead. Writer and television personality David Holmes introduces his memoir by reminding his readers of the video for the Blind Melon song “ No Rain,” explaining how accurately it represents his life. ‘Party of One: A Memoir in 21 Songs’ by Dave Holmes
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